There are few things in this life that I TRULY love. My daughter, Aurora; my wife, Glory; the John Carpenter film, Big Trouble in Little China; and anything having to do with Patrick Swayze. That’s pretty much it. That was until I stumbled across a video clip called, "Aerobic Championships." (now called, "The Aerobic Video Wins Everything")
I first found it on Facebook via a friend, and upon viewing it, I was instantly hooked! The pageantry! The attitude! The rhythm! And all of it dumped on top of an upbeat dance jam that will invade your subconscious like the Nazi’s invading Poland! It’s truly a beautiful piece of work all-around, and has since become the primary obsession in my life.
After sharing the video myself, and watching it a few dozen times, I realized I needed to know more. So, I hopped on Youtube and started searching. It wasn’t long before I happened upon the Youtube account of a fellow named, Prautz. It’s through Prautz that I discovered that the clip is actually edited together (by the Youtuber) from the intros of two shows: The 1987 and 1988 Crystal Light National Aerobic Championships!
Hosted by everyone’s favorite TV dad, and all-around Canadian, Alan Thicke, the Crystal Light National Aerobic Championships were a short-lived celebration of everything spandex, rhythmic dancing, and sass! And talk about DIVERSITY! This aerobic competition didn’t discriminate on any level. Black, white, male, female, muscular or beanpole, if you had a drive to dance, a love of tight-fitting apparel, and a need to sweat—you’re in!
It really makes me sad to think that my child will grow up in a world devoid of the Crystal Light National Aerobic Championships, because that means she’s growing up in a world that’s less happy. My hope is that through these videos, a renewed interest in aerobics is born, and a renaissance of motion and emotion will collide with sound and fashion, and give birth to the return of the Crystal Light National Aerobic Championships…because at least then I’d know that when I die, I’m leaving my daughter in the capable hands of Alan Thicke.
Keep your balls clean.
BTW: I was so enthralled by the music—called "We Are the Winners (Watch Us Shimmer)"—I made an mp3 of it for my ringtone. If you want it, and don’t know how to rip music off of the internet, give me a holler and I’ll send it to you, because I know how important this is to you, and I’m here to help! You’re welcome.